What's All This?

You want to know a secret?

I think there's five babies in here.

Don't tell Darron.

Because really. I look offensively similar to a picture I took six months pregnant with Hinckley. Except this belly isn't cute. Not cute, not perky, and definitely not full of uterus. Kinda smooshy, hanging over my waistband, and full of bean dip and grapenuts.  It's not something I want to show off and yet I don't fit into my regular shirts anymore. Have I mentioned I'm TEN weeks? That's two months. My baby is the size of a pea. Or some sort of smallish legume. I don't know what's going on in there but it is NOT medically necessary, I can tell you that.

Other things going on around the house: Hinckley is playing basketball. Darron I think has finally accepted the fact that his children will not be athletic phenoms. Sigh. Shoulda spent a bit more time scrutinizing my genetic offerings, rather than my backside, huh, pal? But he (Hinckley) is having fun and has gained a lot of confidence. I think basketball is a good one for that. He's also testing my mothering. And it's not holding up so well, truth be told. He has always been my hard one. Please someone tell me that they have a child like this. And that it gets easier when they turn 11 in two weeks.

Halle is just Halle. I wish to death that she could have a little best friend move in next door. She has lots of school friends, but they live so far far away and it's such a production to plan a play date and it really only works on a Saturday that we don't have anything going on. She needs someone she can have over at the drop of a hat. Someone that gets her, someone she can be with for hours on end and never run out of stuff to do and talk about. She's kind of funny. She loves having friends, but is pretty quiet at first and a little hard to get to know. I think it's a struggle for her to break the ice with girls at church that live close by, but that she only sees for a hour or two once a week. I probably feel this more keenly than she does and need to realize that she's only eight and probably has a good eighty or ninety more friend-making years in her.

Ava, as many of you know, has been patching her right eye for 10 months, in order to reverse a lazy eye in the other one. Between that and regular bouts of eye infections and paying $60 every six weeks for check-ups and keeping track of those darned glasses, I cannot wait to be done! For 8 months, it's been right around the corner.

Tommy is still beautiful. And addicted to the Wii. He allegedly only gets one hour of screen time a day. Which gives me time for either a yoga practice or a shower. Some days I want to do both and I "forget" to tell him his time is up. Some days I want (not really) to do laundry and I "forget" again. Sometimes things are so peaceful and quiet and I know he will whine if I tell him his time is up and I deliberately let him play indefinitely. Again, nothing Darron needs to know.

Sorry to sound so morose and incapable. I kind of just complained for five paragraphs. In retaliation, I'll write down five things that are AWESOME about life. Then I'll be done. Promise.

1) Sunday's Downton Abbey episode waiting for me on my DVR. I save them for Darron's bishopric nights.

2) Junk food makes me sick this pregnancy. What a horrid disguised blessing!!

3) I just read two of Shannon Hale's books for the first time. First time reading Shannon Hale, I mean. I found out in a completely embarrassing and quite stalker-like manner-- so obviously involving facebook--that two of her books were on sale for really cheap as ebooks so I bought them and read them and loved them. Read one during the Superbowl, in fact. Best Superbowl ever.

4) People who say nice things. If there is anything sweeter than someone giving a compliment or being kind or showing compassion out of the blue for no good reason, I can't think of what it might be.

5) Praying. Those days when I'm just a mess? And totally overwhelmed or misunderstood or wronged or alone or whatever?! It's a complete miracle to me every time that I can cry or complain or question or rage-- so weak and needy and pathetic. I can dump it all on Him and He sorts it out with me. And gives me peace. And even sometimes a game plan, if I'm ready for it.

But Didn't You Just Say....

I do. I realize this will mean eating an awful lot of my words, but the good news is I am pregnant. I am eight weeks along and since my cowardly stomach muscles abandoned ship four weeks ago, I feel I need to hurry and make the declaration before things get awkward.

I feel great, like the best out of any of my pregnancies. Not a whole lot of nausea-- what a nice little surprise for the woman who was pretty freaked out to get pregnant at *gasp* 35. What I do feel is hungry. And also real lazy. Which, you know, pretty much described me before, but now it's a symptom, not a character flaw.

If I had ANY motivation, I would write a little about my feelings and such and the pact I had to make with the dev--DARRON, I mean Darron, to get this baby going but seriously this pregnancy induced laziness is so bad I just don't think I feel like it. It is so hard being me.

Kettles, Packages, and Noodles: Some Things That Make Me Happy

It's time for a favorites list, isn't it? I think so. Here are some things I'm kinda crazy about right now.

Ok, I was all excited about my local grocery store being bought out by Macey's grocery, which has great prices and selection. I rarely rarely went to the Macey's that was a few towns away because a) it was a few towns away and b) it was crowded! I don't like crowds. I mean it wasn't Walmart crowded, vicious and soulless, but it was always packed. And it attracted couponers like nobody's business so whatever happened to be on sale that week was always sold out. Aargh. It encouraged me to have bad feelings toward bargain shoppers and as a rule I try to not have bad feelings toward any particular shopping constituency. So I loyally frequented my own local (empty but for Saturday nights) grocery store because it was, well, local and empty. When word came that Macey's was moving in, I was so excited to have one close by. Little did I realize that with it would come the crowds I so despise. So it's a good-bad situation. And don't worry, I'm coping, but what I really wanted to talk about before I got mired in all the exposition was THIS!!

Bear River Valley cereals

These!! Bear River Valley cereals, have you seen them? They sell them at Macey's and they are oh so blog-worthy. I had all but cut out cold cereal for lots of high and moral reasons I'm not going into and then I discovered this line. Yes, they are still a processed food, but here is the list of ingredients from this very bag and you can't tell me that your heart doesn't get a little thrill when reading it: Whole grain wheat, evaporated-milled sugar, gelatin. Freshness preserved with vitamin E (mixed tocopherols). Three (THREE) ingredients plus mixed tocopherols which I don't know what they are but I'm trying to bury my head in the sand on that one so don't tell me if you do know. They are more expensive but they are made in Utah and they have far less packaging than normal cereals. There are I think six or so varieties and I am so very pleased with them.

And this... I adore.

Burberry London perfume

I don't know if you know this about me, but I am secretly British. And when I wear my Burberry London perfume it's easier for me to fantasize about walking through the drizzly streets of London with my belted trench and plaid scarf and answering to the name of Pippa. Popping into little bookshops in Notting Hill and having Hugh Grant fall for me. And if you are still buying perfume at a department store and haven't tried fragrancenet.com, you need to. They have awesome prices on so many great perfumes and always have a discount code to use.

But I'm not only stuck in the city. Pippa just as often hails from the countryside and now I've found her perfect address. Edgecombe St. Mary.

Major Pettigrew's Last Stand

If you haven't read this book ohmygosh go do so now! It is easily one of the best books I've read in a long long time. It's so charming. And witty. And biting, but gently so. And perfectly lovely. I will actually read this one again, which I rarely do, because each word is so enjoyable, like an Austen novel, where getting there is 95% of the fun. I'm glad I have a hard copy of this book, it's meant for writing your name in the front cover and dog-earing.

Every good book needs a companion beverage. My recommendation for this fall would be Nutella hot chocolate. I'll give you a moment to swoon ................................. It's simple really; you mix hot milk with a spoonful of unsweetened cocoa powder, two spoonfuls of Nutella, a bit of cream (whipped or not) and a dash of vanilla. It's okay to cry when you take your first sip. Lots of people do. 

Here's to you, Nutella, sweet nectar of life. I love you dearly.

I recently got on Pinterest and it turns out it's not really my thing, but the good that has come out of it is my finding this blog: Hair Romance. All those pictures of blond romantic updos you've seen everybody pinning? They're from this blog and they're beautiful.

I estimate that in one year, my hair will be long enough for most of these and I'm so excited and determined not to cut!

I'm also crazy about my little brother getting married last weekend. Or at least, I yanked myself back from the brink of crazy right in the nick of time. I am embarrassed to say I was crying more than anyone there. My mom, the bride's dad, everyone. At one point I was this close to breaking into heaving sobs. I could feel my shoulders start to convulse and push me forward into my own lap but fortunately was able to catch myself just before I lost it. What was the matter with me? I think the reasons are almost to tender to share, but seeing him being joined to someone who knows exactly who he is and loves him with all her heart made my little cup of joy overflow.

Photo by Stephanie Ryan

I mean really. Could they be any more gorgeous? It's like a solar eclipse. You can only look at them through a paper plate with a hole poked in the middle.

Also! I'm uber happy about this new blogger setup. This has been the easiest post I've ever put together. Let's hear it for cutting and pasting! And for a preview function that (imagine) gives a true preview! And for running out of steam by the end of a post......